Theater Hopping: Observe and Report, or Paul Blart’s evil twin.

Posted on 09 April 2009 by Quaid

Quaid here with your rundown of theatrical releases for the weekend of April 10, 2009.

observereportThere are four movies coming out this weekend, and I’m only interested in one of them.  That’s right, the Seth Rogen led dark comedy Observe and Report will charge into your theater with guns blazing and sirens blaring, and I get the feeling a lot of people are not going to like it.  This movie, about a mall cop trying desperately to shut down the antics of a flasher, looks like it’s going to have about five percent of the audience laughing and the other 95% scratching their heads.  I hope to be in the funny five.

We also have the release of 20th Century Fox’s long-awaited Dragonball: Evolution.  Adapted from the manga created by Akira Toriyama, the movie is about an Alien sent to earth who decides that, instead of destroying us, he will help us fight other evil aliens.  I took one look at the hairstyles in this movie and decided it wasn’t for me.  

hannahmontanamovieAlso in wide release is the Hannah Montana movie, starring Miley Cyrus as a girl whose pop-star persona threatens to take over her “aww, shucks-ey” normal teenage life.  Billy Ray Cyrus, Miley’s real-life Dad, plays Hannah’s on-screen Dad in a rare occasion of life imitating art imitating life.   I’m sure this movie is going to explore the ideas of teenage identity and the hazards of pop culture…NOT!!! (sorry, couldn’t resist).

Finally, Lymelife comes out in limited release.  The movie stars Alec Baldwin as a father whose son, Rory “Don’t call me Macaulay” Culkin, comes down with lyme disease.  Hilarity ensues.

So, folks, that’ll about do it.  If you go see Hannah Montana: The Movie, make sure you complain and get your money back afterward.  We want to keep the grosses low on this one.                           

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