Theater Hopping: The Last House on Witch Mountain

Posted on 13 March 2009 by Quaid

We have two major releases coming out this weekend, and…talk about counter-programming…these two couldn’t be more different.

lasthouseremakeposter1First is the horror remake The Last House on The Left.  Based on the original 1972 film by Wes Craven, this remake seems to have the same basic story line but with significantly higher production value…and less weirdness.  The story follows Mari as she is kidnapped, tortured, and left for dead.  When her parents unknowingly take the group of evil-doers into their home, they find the truth about their guests and exact gruesome vengeance.  This one isn’t for the faint of heart, but I doubt it can match the carnage of the original.

Next up is…another remake!  This time it’s Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson working hard to save two kids from the authorities.  Only the kids only look like kids.  They’re actually telepathic aliens trying to get back to their space ship.  It’s a Race to Witch Mountain!  We already had one little-green-men joke in the trailer, so I think we can expect more of the same from this hackneyed formula.  I remember liking the original as a kid.  For shame.

Also coming out is the Iraq war drama Brothers at War.  The plot centers on one brother who embeds himself in his brother’s unit and experiences the war first hand.  It’s about a nation divided…and a family divided…and other things…divided.

sunshine-cleaningFinally, we get the Amy Adams Sundance movie Sunshine Cleaning.  The plot revolves around two sisters who, in an effort to make enough money to send Adams’ son to a private school, take the job of cleaning up crime scenes.  Suicides, murders, etc…yeah, this one sounds kinda interesting.

I don’t know about you, but I’ll be seeing The Last House on the Left.  Not because I think it will be particularly good, but because I want to see what shape a modern retelling of Craven’s screwed-up sadism/revenge tale will look like.  If you’re in a city showing Sunshine Cleaning, though, you might want to look into it.                           

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