Theater-Hopping: Machetes and shopping, what more could a girl want?

Posted on 12 February 2009 by Quaid

Hi all, Quaid here, offering a rundown of those movies lucky enough to be released in theaters this Valentine’s day weekend.  Here they are…

Confessions of a Shopaholic

A story about debt, shopping, and snagging a hot guy.  This one seems to be tailor-made for the upcoming Valentine’s Day weekend.  It stars Isla Fisher and is directed by P.J. Hogan.  Expect a lot of girls to drag their dates to this one.  Here’s holding my breath that it’s more like the charming Devil Wears Prada and less like the Legally Blonde sequels.

Friday the 13th

Horror fans are both rejoicing and shuddering in fear as director Marcus Nispel unveils his “reinvention” of the classic horror icon Jason Voorhees.  Word has it that the plot of this one is a condensed version of the first three films in the original franchise, and that could really work.  As long as it doesn’t take itself too seriously and allows Jason to be the superhuman killing machine that he always should be.  I’m a little afraid this one will end up a clone of Nispel’s Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake.

The International

Clive Owen is a great actor, but sometimes it feels like he picks his movies by throwing darts at a board.  The International looks like a standard thriller, but who can tell from the trailers, really?  Topically enough, it is about a corrupt bank that is involved in shady and nefarious dealings, but I’m just not so sure that an “evil bank” is exciting enough to draw an audience (unless it’s a documentary).  Funny enough, of all the crazy Bond-ish organizations created for film, a corrupt bank with an agenda and ability to cover up their dealings seems the most plausible.  Still, whenever Owen says “There has to be a way to bring down this bank,” in the trailer, I can’t help but giggle.


This crime drama/gangster movie was a huge hit at the Cannes Film Fest.  It follows the true story of a crime family in Naples, Italy.  Check out the trailer here.  This one is worth a look if you happen to be in one of the cities in which it is being released this week.

Two Lovers

I am always up for a love triangle between Joaquin Phoenix, Gwenith Paltrow, and Vinessa Shaw.  But you can leave Joaquin out of it if you’d like.  This one is described as a “romantic drama,” so I don’t know if it’s going to be packing in the laughs of “Shopaholic.”  After Joaquins Phoenix’s little episode on Letterman, though, this movie has a ton of free publicity.

It looks like Friday and Shopaholic will battle it out for the top spot, but I have a feeling the holdovers Coraline and Taken will do well (especially with Coraline having the 3D theaters all locked up).  Don’t forget the Oscar movies, though, as lapsed film geeks take advantage of the second-to-last weekend to see movies like Slumdog Millionaire.

Of those coming out this week, I know which one I am most looking forward to: Friday the 13th.  Even though I don’t think it will be good, I can’t wait to see some blood and boobs in a packed theater.  Then again, I’m a gore hound.                              

1 Comments For This Post

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